All posts by louise

Talked Off the Ledge to Attend a Royal Banquet

October 28, 2015gratitude, joy, personal growth, sharing the Gospel, Young Lifelouise

Monday. It began with a funny story where yours truly is the brunt of the humor and ended with an amazing Young Life Banquet where Jesus was clearly central: high and lifted up!

Allegorically, it’s the story of each of us. Whether things look and feel good or bad, in our flesh, we are living on the brink of eternal disaster. The good news is we are invited to be children of our Heavenly King! To share in His royal banquet table. Though it’s all up to Jesus, sometimes He gives us a little help from our friends to find our way from darkness to light.

James 1:17 “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”

We were keeping Penny, my daughter’s young dog. I took her for a quick visit to the grass before my busy day. I noticed the plastic sheets protecting Rob’s front porch renovation had flipped up exposing everything to the next few days of forecast rain…

Rob was already going to be late to work after hauling 2 grills-on-wheels Young Life was borrowing for the event that night. Surely I could climb on the porch roof to resolve this without help.

No problem getting up the ladder or repositioning the plastic to protect the wood. Penny happily frolicked below. All was well.

Then I inched to the edge of the roof and sat by the extension ladder (all while on the phone with a friend). I quickly and correctly realized there was no possible way to get on the ladder from my current position without falling.

Panic set in… I admitted my predicament to my friend (who had no idea I had climbed onto the roof as we talked), and she offered to come over. I hesitated then accepted. At least she could call 911 if I fell!

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 “Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up.”

We hung up, so I could call Rob who had climbed all day Sunday for advice (what kind of nut takes a phone up a ladder to the roof?? Thank goodness I did!) He had been this path before…

Proverbs 17:17 “A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity.”

Nothing Rob suggested made sense — unless he wanted me to use the extended top of the ladder for torc to bury me after I fell! Tears began to flow.

Just as it began sprinkling Rob said, “This is bad.”

I countered, “I know it is! I’m crying and scared!” All while thinking, why is my calm and steady husband telling me it’s bad… he’s supposed to have answers, not add to the misery.

He said, “No I mean the girl is gone.”

Me: “What girl?” Now I’m wondering why he cares about any other girl in the world when “his girl” is stuck on the roof crying in the rain!

Him: “No, the grill! I dropped off the first grill in the Bonefish parking lot just 15 minutes ago, then went to get the 2nd… now the other one is GONE! This is bad.”

Me: “Wait a minute — PENNY, come back! Good girl, now stay.” (Hahaha… that was repeated continuously as she enjoyed her freedom.) “Oh no, do you think the grill is stolen? Hang up and do what you need to do! I’ll figure this out myself…” More crocodile tears, but I’m capable, self sufficient and reasonable (that’s what got me up here in the first place).

Rob brought back from the missing grill to the roof crisis says, “No, we’ll get you down first!”

I was humbled, out of ideas, and very willing to accept help despite our disconnect. With a little more talking we realized Rob was assuming I was standing when in reality, I was sitting beside the ladder with my legs dangling over the ledge (the position that seemed safest to me when 15 feet in the air).

Proverbs 12:15 “The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice.”

Perspective is everything… all his catastrophic directives became scary but understandably correct when I stood up. I hugged the rungs and made my way down the ladder, just as my sweet, loyal friend pulled up.

Safely on the ground, we hung up to let Rob find the missing grill. (Despite Bonefish being locked up and dark, it seems the chef was present and had pulled the grill around back. False alarm. Mystery solved!)

My friend and I got Penny inside, then realized the plastic had blown back on the roof! Thank goodness Divine intervention blew it down again and we taped it in place. Most of all my compassionate sister was present with me until I regained composure. Though I was never in real danger (what’s a little time spent on the roof in a thunderstorm?), I was shaken up.

Running a little late, but no worse for the wear, I went about my schedule in anticipation of Act II: The Young Life Banquet — where the real story is told.

I wish you ALL could have been there! An army of volunteers with some incredible leaders transformed a horse arena into a banquet hall fit for a royal celebration! Almost 600 guests began flowing in while over 100 high school and college volunteers served and prepared finishing touches. Smiles, hugs and conversation were so plentiful we had trouble getting the show on the road.

But a well-known and beloved FSU coach could preach with authority what needed to be said, “Y’all need to sit down and be quiet, so we can pray!”

A hush fell over the crowd as he thanked Jesus for all His bounty and blessings, for all the families represented, for the food, the venue and for Young Life… all in Jesus’ name.

Romans 12:6 “In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well.”

Many spoke after Him. We even had a performance from well-known Christian singers who believe in Young Life and even more so, in Jesus. We sang. We prayed. We laughed. Some cried. We heard stories about how people realized for the first time that they mattered personally to a God who cares about the details of our lives. A God who says come as you are… through Jesus, I want to bring you from death to Life! Life to the FULL!

From start to finish it was all about Jesus. Our desire is that the name of Jesus would be lifted up every time we have a Young Life event, and Monday’s banquet shouted His name in praise! I sensed no one wanted to leave…

While most good things come to an end, God’s love doesn’t! He is the Living Water. Jesus said in John 4:14, “whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”

That’s what I saw happening as guests reluctantly left for home, and others worked together to transform the royal banquet hall into an arena ready again for horses.

As I read posts and heard the buzz Tuesday morning, it was obvious Jesus is still working — welling up in us the desire to love and seek Him, and to carry out His purposes — wherever we fit in His body.

Hebrews 4:16 “Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.”

We had prayed for all the details of the night we could think of. John 14:13-14 says, “Whatever you ask in My name, that will I do, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask Me anything in My name, I will do it.”

The rain held off and hearts were touched. I’m pretty sure we haven’t seen the end of how Jesus will use that night where some broken people humbly sought to proclaim Jesus and what He is doing with the hope of ultimately sharing the Gospel with Tallahassee’s adolescent population.

Ephesians 3:20-21 says “Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen.” And AMEN!

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link to Tallahassee Young Life

SIN: Great Description! Hint: It’s Not All About Immorality

October 5, 2015Freedom, heart of prayer, personal growthlouise

“Just as through one man sin entered the world, and death through sin, and thus death spread to all men, because all sinned…” (Romans 5:12)

“The nature of sin is not immorality and wrongdoing, but the nature of self-realization which leads us to say, “I am my own god.” This nature may exhibit itself in proper morality or in improper immorality, but it always has a common basis—my claim to my right to myself. When our Lord faced either people with all the forces of evil in them, or people who were clean-living, moral, and upright, He paid no attention to the moral degradation of one, nor any attention to the moral attainment of the other. He looked at something we do not see, namely, the nature of man.

“He did not need any testimony about mankind, for he knew what was in each person.” (John 2:25)

Sin is something I am born with and cannot touch— only God touches sin through redemption. It is through the Cross of Christ that God redeemed the entire human race from the possibility of damnation through the heredity of sin. God nowhere holds a person responsible for having the heredity of sin, and does not condemn anyone because of it.

***Condemnation comes when I realize that Jesus Christ came to deliver me from this heredity of sin, and yet I refuse to let Him do so.

From that moment I begin to get the seal of damnation. “This is the condemnation [and the critical moment], that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light…” (John 3:19). (excerpts from My Utmost for His Highest, November 25, 848 R)

I am saved; but am I really ALL IN with God as Lord of ALL my life? Are you? Do I trust Him? In any present tense moment the answer is black or white: yes or no. Trust doesn’t have a gray area. I’m aware that sometimes I’m living as I want to (believing I have a right to myself), in ways that feel good and proper to me, and fitting this “feel good” religion into my definition of life.

God has me in a process of looking at what I believe about Godly living, doing away with much of it (because the world is so immeshed and intertwined in my views), so I can get back to the heart of Christ and His desire for me. Self-effort doesn’t eradicate sin. God does, in our surrender to Him.

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” (Romans 12:2)

Lately I’ve landed in the “confused” chapter of the process… What does love look like in THIS situation, God? How can I fit in focused time with YOU and take care of family, work, serving others (all good and necessary things)… How can I totally forgive when the arrows keep flying? God I’m so overwhelmed. Yet nothing I am doing is negotiable. How can You multiply my time and make it all doable… it feels like I’m drowning in my circumstances…

“For God is not a God of confusion but of peace” (1 Corinthians 4:33)

“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” (1 Peter 5:8)

Of course my adversary is attacking in the midst of all You are accomplishing in my heart. This “chapter,” or diversion really, has his fingerprints all over it…

“Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world.” (1 John 4:1)

Sunday, I heard a powerful verse in a new song — “In over my Head.”

Listen to it all, but here are some excerpts from the lyrics that really impacted me…

“I have come to this place in my life/ I’m full but I’ve not satisfied/ This longing to have more of You/ I can feel it my heart is convinced/ I’m thirsty my soul can’t be quenched/ You already know this but still/ Come and do whatever You want to…

And You crash over me, I’m where You want me to be
I’m going under, I’m in over my head
Whether I sink, whether I swim
It makes no difference when I’m beautifully in over my head.”

What better place to be than deeply immersed and living in Jesus. Inviting Him to overtake more of me. I have a choice… I can be swallowed up by the very real drama and situations of my life, or I can be sure I am immersed in Jesus and His Word through my earthly circumstances… then sink or swim, it doesn’t matter. I am living in His desires. Living for His Kingdom.

Jesus — thank you for Your PROMISES and TRUTH!

“Think over what I say, for the Lord will give you understanding in everything.” (2 Timothy 2:7)

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.” (Matthew 7:7)

“But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” (Isaiah 40:31)

If like me, you are thinking, “Jesus I want to go where you lead. To obey YOU. But sometimes, I don’t know how obedience looks in my complicated world. This doesn’t feel practical.” Our very concrete answer is our very first step toward obedience…

Way to often, I neglect my Bible. I rush through devotionals to check a box rather than waiting to hear His still, small voice.

How well do we know the Word of God? Well enough “to discern the difference between human traditions and Scriptural principles? To follow God, we need to know His Word, and we need to know God personally.” (from Michael Youssef’s devotional, same day. God’s hammering it home.)

I used to have a recurring dream. I’m in college… it’s the the morning of a big exam, and I’m totally unprepared for it. I’ve been doing other things… In some cases I haven’t even attended class, much less read the book and notes! Failure is all but assured if we don’t listen to the Teacher and prepare by studying His material… Youssef goes on to say, “Knowing God’s Word is crucial for successfully navigating through the tests we face.”

“I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you” (Psalm 119:11).

Prayer: Jesus thank you for hammering home Your Truths. For reminding me that I sin daily when I believe I have a right to living my own way. That your discipline is not condemning, but restorative. You forgive me fully when I repent. Help me to seek You and Your Word and to believe Your promises and Truths, so I am prepared for every test of my obedience. Jesus crash over Me! In Jesus’ name. Amen.

When Everything Around You Is Changing

September 18, 2015Freedom, heart of prayer, Mid life, Purpose, waitinglouise

The planned rhythm of my days was only an illusion. My veiled attempt to bring comfort, understanding and safety to a wild, wild world.

My stress level was too high. I‘m not alone. ABC News reported that “Gallup Healthways Well Being Index show that women ages 45 to 64 have the lowest well being of any age group or gender.” For the first time ever, women may NOT outlive their spouses.

God gently told me to “stop.” I did, and here I am in an uneasy transition. I’m very busy on the surface with the day-to-day privilege of loving my husband, 2 parents, 5 children and many friends — all while planning 2 weddings and maintaining a normal household and schedule (much like you, I’m sure).

Yet as far as formal serving, life goals and purpose go, I’m being much more than I’m doing. What’s happening in me seems to be more significant than the obvious disturbance caused by the empty nest of a Mid-life Mom… Who am I and What am I to Do?

I was recently asked, “what are you doing now that you aren’t working?” I started describing my recent flurry of proudly productive busyness — then stopped.

While a consumer of my time, my to-do list is not my life’s purpose. Not the a real answer to their question. I shifted, “I’m not doing much beyond waiting to hear from God what He has next for me.”

We all felt the awkward silence. Graciously my friend asked, “Are you still playing tennis?”

“Not much, but we are on Young Life Board.” I caved. The respectability of a definable position and purpose eased the uncomfortableness of the moment. The conversation shifted — I avoided prolonged awkwardness and with it intimacy, depth and authenticity.

It occurred to me that I needed to take to heart the ways God has been validating my journey and to be willing to share the uneasy nature of my current season.

You know how when God has a theme for you, it starts appearing in various forms from every direction? Well that’s what’s been happening.

God has asked me to take a step forward — out of my race car into a simpler life (like my Granny’s?). To let go of what’s aways worked and defined “Life” for me and to embrace an unknown, unrevealed future.

I’m reminded of the “already, but not yet” nature of our salvation. Is the Kingdom of God a future reality to be hoped for or a present truth to be experienced? The answer is both. We enjoy many blessings here, but nothing compared to our heavenly inheritance. We can grow and overcome, but we’ll never find perfection on this earth. Jesus has already defeated death, sin and Satan, but we must still fight the war… you get the picture.

He’s called me into the unknown. I know I’ve already stepped into it by faith, but I don’t know what it is — not yet. I’ve been in similar places. Where the rug was seemingly pulled from under me, life took an unexpected turn — I plunged head first into new territory, and God was faithful. Looking back it’s clear that my most important growth has intersected with life changes and transitions.

I’m rarely hospitable when Change first knocks at my door — sometimes it has to bust in. But when God makes it clear that my soul is clay in His hands, I’ve learned to trust Him. He always makes me more fully myself.

This time, His invitation was gentle. In some ways the subtlety makes it harder to trust that He’s at work. But I have faith that the growth He’s already accomplishing won’t be wasted, even though my path isn’t easily defined or labelled.

Following are some general messages I’ve repeatedly encountered during this already but not yet transition. Things God has been nudging me to live out — helping me to see there is divine purpose in this weird limbo. They all point to fixing my eyes on Jesus and walking in His Truth — always a good strategy.

1. Quit criticizing and complaining.
Negativity is derived from an erroneous belief in perfection. If you’re in a habit of pointing out the bad, switch it around! Point out the positive attributes of a rainy day, an overbearing person, a traffic jam… Perfection is a lie for this world, BUT beauty is all around us.

“This is the day that the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.” (Psalm 118:24)

“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up” (1 Thes 5:11)

“Do not judge, and you will not be judged.Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” (Luke 6:37)

2. Quit glamorizing and reliving the past. Life is in the present moment! If your mind is focused on the past with either longing or regret, not only does it detract from the present, but sometimes you totally miss God’s opportunities. The past is being used by God for your good — no matter how it went down. Today you have gifts to share and people to love. Be fully present.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.” (Isaiah 43:18-19)

3. Be Disciplined. Paul said, “…I take every thought (and project) prisoner to make it obey Christ….” (2 Cor 10:5, parenthesis mine) Much work done in the name of “Christian living” hasn’t been disciplined, but is birthed through personal impulse and desire. Every undertaking of Jesus was disciplined to the will of His Father — “the Son can do nothing of Himself…” (John 5:19).

Be real — what do we usually do? We jump into every project that seems good, worthy, interesting, fun… immediately, instead of quietly and methodically seeking Christ’s will for us first (This is not to say you can’t respond in the moment, but from a life of abiding).

“Practical work for Christians is greatly overemphasized today… But true determination and zeal are found in obeying God, not in the inclination to serve Him that arises from our own undisciplined human nature.” (My Utmost for His Highest) Though we are well-meaning, we are often simply doing “for God” things we have instigated ourselves.

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” (Romans 12:2)

4. Love. Is God really my number one love? Do I even try to love my neighbor as myself? I’m not sure who my neighbor is in our modern world — or sometimes what loving looks like. The Greatest Commandment is certainly worthy of my contemplative prayer.

“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.'” (Matthew 22:37-39)

I don’t have it figured out — far from it! My overwhelming reality is that when I get to heaven, I will realize how far from His way I have lived. But I feel thankfulness and hope in this, not condemnation or despair. Thankfulness for the time and freedom to seek His face, and hope that He is transforming me and my life daily to better reflect Him.